7 Jul 2009  ::  Doesn't Pay The Bills
Today, after a fruitless cruise through the craigslist job listings I returned to the main page and saw "missed connections," and wondered how entertaining it might be, given a fateful day many moons ago, Peanut and Sweet Caroline both linked me to a missed connection where a woman yearned for a man clad in plaid, giving out flowers and was named "Asher." Of course, we all hoped it was Jev and that it would result in fourteen kids out of wedlock, but had that happened, we'd all still be young with nothing left to look forward to.

However, craigslist managed to allow me to further delight in its offerings with this. In a town that surely has one too many Pauls, I can be fairly certain that it was not directed towards me, as the girl who posted it is a little too intelligent for me; sure, I'd love for girls to miss me, but the mental acumen to remember to do so on a daily basis would be entirely too taxing for them and they'd miss a day or two for recovery or forgetfulness. And obviously, she is a little too old.

What makes her too intelligent? The fact that she uses punctuation? God help you if she properly capitalized words, too!

I miss you, but I only think about you once a week--today's your day!

Comment added on 7 Jul 2009 by Emily

Unfortunately, the posting has now been deleted. Sad. I am just going to assume that it was hilarious, witty and described you perfectly. Nice work, Paul. Unless you wrote it yourself. That would just make you vain.

Comment added on 8 Jul 2009 by Dan

It said something like this;

paul w4m- 21

I think about you every day. I miss you, and have forgiven you. You are the most amazing man in the world with amazing biceps and keen wit.*

*Ok, not the last sentence, but it was clearly implied.

Comment added on 8 Jul 2009 by paulrarearfe